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It’s no wonder that Elvis put on some pounds in his later years.

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Eating in Memphis. Eating with my feet ten feet off of Beale.

E-e-eating in Memphis. Are you going to barbecue that veal? 

Central BBQ (Midtown)

Central’s been spotlighted on shows like “Pitmasters,” “The Best Thing I Ever Ate,” and “BBQ with Bobby Flay.” No surprise. I hardly had the first rib to my lips when my mouth went into full-on, premature foodgasm – and I hadn’t even laid on the sauce yet! So smoky those ribs were … tender, meaty, juicy, with a slightly chewy exterior. I don’t think there’s any better eating in Memphis.

What I Had:

• Half-Slab Ribs Plate, $15.99. Flat-out the best ribs I’ve ever had. Juicy but not fatty. Beautifully tender, but not completely falling apart. Dry rub, which is how they do things in Memphis. Delectable. If you don’t find yourself wanting to suck on the bones, I’ll be surprised.
• Mild and Hot sauce, included. Actually, all sauces are included, but I limited myself to those. They’re served warm. The “mild” was perfect … everything you’d ever dream of in a BBQ sauce. If they’d’ve let me, I’d’ve bathed in it. The “hot” was good, too, but it had a vinegar overtone that I wasn’t in the mood for.
• BBQ Beans, included. They look like very saucy pork-n-beans, but when you gobble up a spoonful – surprise! It’s got a pronounced jalapeño kick, while at the same time, the sauce it pointedly sweet. A very interesting combination, and quite new to me.
• Ghost River “Riverbank Red” Irish-Style Red Ale, $4.50. A local brew. Mild, well-balanced, lighly sweet, lightly hoppy. Excellent with the ribs.

Ambiance: a Memphis microcosm: funky, low-brow, diverse. I swear to you, there was one of everyone amongst the diners … Asians, Caucasians, African Americans, beautifully bearded hipsters that (sorry Wicker Park) looked indigenous rather than studied, suburban moms and dads with little kids, khaki-clad people who clearly just got out of work, a couple of hoodlums; a probably-gay, clearly middle-aged couple who seemed to be literally studying the place’s trendiness; other people who looked like they just got out of Baptist church on Easter Sunday; the whitest guy I ever saw, in an Izod polo shirt over a flabby gut and pink Ralph Loren shorts exposing legs pastier than breadstick dough; some dope dude guy juggling soda cups … I swear to God there was even a hunchback, and there was and a magical negro espousing wisdom from a rocking chair on the front porch.

Otherlands Coffee Bar

What I Had:

• Cold Brew, $3. Slow, low, and mellow. Very easy to drink unsweetened. Almost devoid of high notes, it welcomes you like a fat CMaj⁺⁶ chord and reveals a hidden sliver of dryness only as the final hint of tone is all but inaudible.
• Carrot Cake one day, Bran Loaf the next, a couple of bucks each: pretty good everyday fare.

To say the atmosphere is ‘eclectic‘ doesn’t even begin to describe it. Oh, and it smells exactly like a food co-op. I’ll admit that it does seem like you have to say, “Uh, excuse me. I’d like a cup of coffee” to the staff. But once you have their attention, everyone seems sweet and charming – which seems to be true of Memphisosians (I made that term up on the spot; hope you like it, Memphis) in general. I can’t believe how many genuine smiles I get, just walking around town – and I look nothing like Elvis.

Gibson’s Donuts

With one bite, Gibson’s skyrocketed into the elite inner circle of my favorite doughnut shops. OK, so maybe it wasn’t literally “with one bite.” Because that one bite was followed furiously by several more bites until I rather quickly demolished four of these Red Velvet doughnuts. But somewhere in there, I fell in love. Thank God I don’t live in Memphis, or I’d probably eat so many Gibson’s doughnuts that I’d have to empty out my 401k to support my habit.

These Red Velvets are cake-style, but more dense and moist than you might expect. The doughnut hole is small to the point that it almost isn’t a hole at all. It’s sort of swollen shut. The frosting: cream cheesy, but not cloying … luscious. They’re small; you can down one in five bites. But at the same time, they’re very, very rich. $11 for the dozen.

Central BBQ (Midtown)

That’s right. It was so good, I had to go back, this time dragging a bunch of friends with me. What I had this time:

• Smoked Hot Wings, $9.99. Marinated overnight, slow smoked, then finished in the deep fryer. Served dry (with hot rub). In a word: HOT.
• BBQ Nachos, $10.25. Pulled pork served atop a bed of tortilla chips, topped with BBQ sauce, cheese sauce, shredded cheese, and jalapenos. Finished off with a light dusting of BBQ Shake. I feel the same way about the nachos as I do about the wings: a novelty item. They’re perfectly fine – in fact both the nachos and the wings get singled out a lot by reviewers – and I was satisfied with them … but I couldn’t stop from wishing that I’d ordered another slab of those amazing ribs.

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Also Recommended – Babalu Tacos and Tapas. Guacamole made tableside: Hass avocado, sun-dried tomato, red & green onion, Kosher salt, cilantro, lime juice, house chips. Lamb Barbacoa: Rosen Farms all natural lamb shoulder, tzatziki sauce, cucumber-tomato salsa, cotija. Pan-roasted redfish: Rostï potatoes, smoked corn pico de gallo, red chili butter sauce. Delta Paloma: Cathead Vodka, fresh-squeezed grapefruit juice, cilantro, mint, cucumber, agave nectar, fresh-squeezed sour mix, Fever Tree club soda. PLUS, a pineapple margarita served with an alcohol-soaked pineapple chunk so deadly, people who’ve downed it in one bite have been known to pass out. Brother Juniper’s. Don’t judge by the childish website; this is a stellar breakfast restaurant. One of my breakfast companions had the San Diegan open-faced omelet (a bed of sour cream & home fries topped w/portobellos, tomatoes, bacon, green onions, feta, & cheddar cheese) and said it was the best thing he’d ever eaten! And If You Must – Charles Vergo’s Rendezvous. Cheese and Sausage appetizer, Charcoal Broiled Lamb Riblets (stellar!), Pork Ribs & Shoulder Combination, Beef Brisket. Good food, but not as mind-blowing as Central. Service: when I asked the waiter to split the bill between two credit cards, he rolled his eyes at me.

Eating in Memphis

Credits for all images on this page: Make It Like a Man, except as noted. Hover over image and/or green text for more info. Click to jump to source.

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